Is it just looks or are there other reasons? For me, it was initially not looks for the most part (this was 15+ years ago), but now looks are definitely holding me back.
Here are examples from my own life
- Autism: I would describe it as like being illiterate rather than being “socially awkward”. I often have time talking to both men and women outside of a romantic setting.
- Chronic Illness: I think I’m high functioning enough to have overcome some of my social inadequacies, but my chronic illness has destroyed that possibility. I’m too sick to work and rarely leave the house
- Mental Illness: I have issues stemming from parental neglect and childhood bullying (which my parents were partially responsible for). I now have complex PTSD.
- Looks: My chronic illness and mental illness has made it very difficult to maintain my weight and physical appearance overall
- Money: My chronic illness has prevented me from working. I’m also unable to drive because of my illness so I can’t even borrow my parents car.
- No Social Life: If you’re a guy and your online profile doesn’t have any pictures with you and your friends, your status is going to go down. Or if you’re asked “what do you do for fun?” and none of your activities involve friends, it’s going to seem weird.
- Age: I don’t think this needs to be explained
- Transgender: I haven’t transitioned yet, but will be an issue. And even now, I’m sort of in a limbo state. I’m overweight so I guess my breasts (I’m on hormones) could be explained away, but I’d rather be honest if I were to date. I’ve heard some women are into “masculine presenting trans lesbians”, but I don’t know where to find these women…
Some other things that could play a part in others
- Location: Too many men and not enough women
- Religion: You’re religious and most other aren’t or you’re an atheist in an area where many are religion
- Politics: You’re liberal or conservative and most are the opposite
- Race: If you’re a racial minority, you will have a harder time
- Wrong hobbies/interests: You’re a nerd and everyone else is into sports and/or NASCAR
- Height: I’m 6’0" so not an issue now, but as a trans woman this might hurt me idk
It seems Monday is back so I’ll post one of his videos on the subject