I would like to share my origins with people here because I find my own very interesting in that I’ve never came across anybody with the same misfortunes that I have had in life.
My family came to the United States primarily from Catholic German and French immigrants after the fallout of World War II. My father’s side of the family were Ashkenazi Austro-Hungarian Jews. I was abandoned by that side of my family and I’ve never known them at all.
Yes, you heard me right when I just said all of that.
Basically my Jewish father met my Catholic German mother at a Led Zeppelin concert where in his eyes my mother was merely a German shiksa to be used and later abandoned.
Afterwards when I was born he promptly abandoned me and my mother entirely. My mother confronted his Jewish family about the incident or affair and they all turned their backs on her calling her a bunch of nasty names. Because my mother was a Catholic German his family didn’t accept her or me. For them her pregnancy along with me was null and void meant to be disregarded with extreme prejudice. My birth into this world was considered an abomination from day one.
The only memory I have of my father is him kicking my face into the ground in an outside parking lot and that has only been the lasting memory impression of him that I’ve carried away with me all these years. Afterwards my mother became a drug addict and I became orphaned to which I was placed in an orphanage at the age of five.
I was later adopted by a Catholic Italian family at the age of ten.
It seems I’ve never have fit anywhere concerning my own ethnic origins and while my father was an Ashkenazi Jew I was raised Catholic in an Italian household. I’m a sort of hybrid genetic stock that doesn’t fit anywhere it seems. It’s like I am some sort of living genetic abomination or aberration that has no place anywhere.
While I was raised Christian I’ve never really liked or cared for Christianity all that much. In fact I hate all Abrahamic religions equally. For me Christianity, Judaism, and Islam are all equally poisonous religions. While my father was an Austro Hungarian Ashkenazi Jew I was never raised to be Jewish and I’ve never embraced the Jewish religion or identity.
I’ve always have held more an affinity for pagan or eastern religions where before embracing all of that I was an atheist for the longest time.
My real mother is dead now and so are my adoptive Italian parents as well. I’m all alone in this world now so it seems. I’ve outlived them all. From my real mother’s side of the family I have a few distant relatives [French and German portion] but the relationship there socially is tenuous at best.
It sucks not having a family and not belonging anywhere. My entire life has been one of extreme loneliness.